Recently, The Boyfriend banned me from using the word “hate” for a week, whilst I banned him from saying “meh”. Apparently I use “hate” far too much when I don’t really mean it (“I hate the morning”; “I hate Hollyoaks now John Paul isn’t in it”; “My iPhone has crashed. I hate it”). I couldn’t help but wonder: is there too much hate in my Blog? Blog posts including “Why I Hate Yoghurt Adverts”; “What Is The Most Depressing Song Of All Time?”; “The Top 10 Worst Lyrics (Of Recent Years)” suggest possibly yes.

Turning over a new leaf, I’ve embarked on a new direction: a post full of Love, inspired by, who else but “singer, actor, dancer, musical performer, and media personality” John Barrowman. And why does JB deserve such love, you ask? “You fools!” I say, ”here are a mere 10 reasons why”.

1. It’s John Barrowman’s fault that I’m gay

Does anyone remember an amazing children’s TV show circa 1994 called “The Movie Game”, which JB presented? I do, because it was BRILLIANT and, in it, contestants made their way around a life-size board game, landing on squares that magicaly transported you to a movie set for an exciting challenge.

Onto the point: it was watching this show aged 12 that I realised that the American host was very attractive – and thereby by extension that the male sex were generally so too. If JB – the epitome of male attractiveness – hadn’t been on tele at this pivotal moment in my life, would I still be gay? I’m not 100% sure.

2. He presented “Live & Kicking”

There was no better way to spend a Saturday morning in your early teens than sat next to the video recorder frantically jabbing the record button to ensure that every 10 second snippet of your favourite band who were on Live & Kicking that week was recorded for posterity. And JB presented it.

3. He stared in “Megaladon: Shark Attack 3”

Who doesn’t love a good shark attack movie?  It’s a little known fact that JB starred in one of the best. Megaldaon 3 is a straight-to-video epic tale of a prehistoric 100 foot shark from the ice age terrorising a small US sea-side community. Unfortunately the budget didn’t match the creative ambition of the project and it looks like they could only afford the one stock image of a shark jumping out of the water. This doesn’t ruin the film’s impact though as I barely noticed that every time someone was eaten the same clip of a shark leaping out of the water was shown with various victims superimposed on top. As if it couldn’t get better, the film also includes JB articulating the most wildly inappropriate one-liner ever (too rude for this Blog). All of it makes me love JB more.

4. He was a first

JB’s character of Captain Jack in Doctor Who and Torchwood broke boundaries. He was the first non-heterosexual action hero in a mainstream TV show – and in a children’s TV show to boot.

Plus, the 5-parter of Torchwood on BBC was genuinely one of the best shows on tele last year. John Barrowman was pretty epic in it; especially when he happened to get naked whilst being stuck in a concrete block.

5. He has two accents

In 2008, JB took part in a BBC Documentary, to determine why he was gay (nature, nurture, etc). This led to an interesting moment where JB wired up his private parts to sensors and was then made to look at nice pictures of men to see if he fancied them. (I sometimes wonder if the wiring of the privates was really necessary in the name of science? He could probably have just told us if he liked the nice pictures of men). Anyway, there was a genuinely monumental discovery in this Documentary, when JB travelled home to meet his Scottish parents and without warning erupted into a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT SCOTTISH ACCENT. It was so Scottish he practically became a walking bagpipe. I cannot express how much I love it when he says: “You dressed me in a bikini!”.

6. He’s a Leading Man

Star of too many musicals to mention, his leading man status was best epitomised for me in the amazing TV show he hosted recently where celebrities sang classics from musicals. JB comes on at the end to perform, starting with an amazing Jesus Christ Superstar, which he merges seamlessly into the Rocky Horror Show. Then something odd happens and for some reason other people who are not JB sing for a while; and then everything is good  again when JB reappears and belts out an amazing “One Day More” from Les Mis to end. Watch it to believe it.

7. He knows how to judge a Reality TV Show

Who else could get away with tasks like “all the contestants must kiss me and through this I’ll pick which one would make the best Maria in the Sound of Music”?

8. He duets like no one has before  

Any of you who read my blog during the X Factor would know, I love gender reversal in songs. JB, unafraid to challenge stereotypes, recently took on “I Know Him So Well” with the lovely Daniel Boys – a classic musical duet sang by two women in love with the same man. There are so few songs sang by men that are overtly about men, which makes this bloody refreshing to hear.

9. He provided the world with an emotional life-anthem

Whilst we’re on music, his cover of “I Made It Through the Rain” become a phenomena last year when radio presenter Chris Moyles tried to get it to the top of the charts. It is a monumental, epic ballad about triumphing through adversity and when JB sings about his parade you just know it’s undoubtedly great.

10. He’s a great role model

And, can I end with a disclaimer at the bottom please, just in case JB ever reads this (which is, no doubt, likely). Despite the occasional moments of affectionate ribbing above (characteristic of my posts) I genuinely think JB is great. As an openly gay, married man he’s a fantastic role model for young gay people. And I particularly love the below glimpse into his married life.

JB, if you’re reading, the blog would also really love a signed photo.

Right, there you go. I used the world love at least eleven times in that post, so the Boyfriend should be very pleased.

P.S. I refuse to acknowledge the rumours about him and birthday cake.