X Factor 2010: Week One (Part One)
Oct 10th
Preface
So, Mark (the voice of popular culture) is currently overseas and unable to watch the first X Factor live show. Subsequently, I have been politely asked (i.e. ordered) to take his place with a special guest blog on the first show. I am reliable informed that hordes of Internet Followers will be flocking to the site tonight to get their first fix of this year’s live X Factor commentary.
But what am I to write? I’ve been told I am free to do as I see fit, but as I sat down to start this post, I realised such carte blanche was dangerous… Read the rest of this entry »
10 Popular Culture Predictions for 2010
Jan 3rd
In a quiet point during a Sunday afternoon Come Dine With Me marathon, my (Highly Effective) Corporate Flatmate and I discussed predictions for our friends in 2010. Whilst those predictions probably would be of interest to my Internet Following (which is mostly comprised of these friends) I have decided instead to publish 10 popular culture predictions for 2010. The aim is that, when each of these come true, I will be heralded as the Voice of Popular Culture and quickly approached by the Guardian to live blog for them.
So here we go:
1. A Friends reunion film will be announced.
After the success of Sex And The City: The Movie, *surely* the cast will realize there’s money in a movie? Friends is still loved (just ask E4) and time is running out. (PS. I still get a point if there is a one-off TV special).
2. The current Sugababes (version 4) will implode.
Due to the lack of a coherent identity. Version 1 will rise from their ashes.
3. Dannii will leave the X Factor and be replaced by Robbie Williams/Victoria Beckham/Eminem.
There was definitely something of the “I know I’ll probably be fired next year so I’m going to be occasionally subversive” about Dannii Minogue on the X Factor this year.
4. Robbie and Take That will properly reform.
At least for a one off charity single.
5. Twitter will be replaced with an even more relevant social networking tool.
Well, Facebook was trumped this year by Twitter: what comes around goes around.
6. Peter and Katie will get back together. And then split up again.
There will be an ITV2 show documenting every step of this process.
7. A group will win the X Factor 2010.
X Factor has shown it can produce successful female winners (Leona, Alexandra) and that it usually doesn’t produce successful male winners (Steve, Leon, Shayne, Joe). Following JLS, 2010 is the year for the show to prove that a group can win. Just so something new happens.
8. Eternal will reform.
Surely it is their year? Who can not love a band that incorporated three plus key changes into one song?
9. The ginger haired one from Girls Aloud will become the new Kate Bush, against all expectations.
Her awkward self-consciousness is the most interesting thing about Girls Aloud videos (after seven years she still looks embarrassed to be a popstar). Just imagine the fascinating solo career.
10. Something truly shocking will happen on Big Brother.
As it’s the final show, the Producers will not give a monkeys and will engineer something *truly* shocking. I predict a “housemates have 1 minute to decide as a group which other housemate to eat” task. Or maybe “one of the housemates is actually a cat” shocker.
So there we go. Please do add your own predictions below.
X Factor: Week 7 Results (George Michael & Wham week)
Nov 22nd
- Have I become desensitised or was the group performance of “Wake Me Up Before You Go Go” not utterly hideous? It had all the ingredients of being so, but somehow hovered around bearable.
- Taking my cynical hat off for one bullet point, I like that Reality TV has meant someone as unlikely as Susan Boyle now has a chance at a music career. Even if it also gave her a nervous breakdown. [EDIT: With further thought I'd disappointed. How much better would it have been if she'd have come back with a "Bleeding Love"/"Bad Boys" instead of that cover.]
- I think we’d have all preferred it if Mariah Carey had sung “All I Want For Christmas”. In fact I’d quite like it if she re-released “Fantasy/Dreamlover” (double A-side) every summer and “All I Want For Christmas” every December. Mariah had everything for her performance: the golden waterfall, the halo light, a gospel choir, indoor fireworks. It’s just a shame she doesn’t have the songs these days to match her voice. I refuse to acknowledge that she was miming and instead insist she can actually sing that well.
- Can I ever forgive her for the below remix (and video) though? Why is her eye sideways?
- My shocking mathematical formula was spot on! Sod my flawed instinct. I’m all Derren Brown.
- Why on earth did Twin Peaks choose “No Matter What” as their desperation song? Did they genuinely pick this? A song with singing and leaps between notes? Is it paranoid to suggest the Puppet Masters made them do this to ensure they’d go this time and save the show a small amount of credibility/believability/relevance?
- Having said that, Cheeky Chappy was quite out of tune too. And yet despite this, I still prefer him leaps and bounds to “very in tune” Joe and “normally in tune but occasionally wildly off tune” Danyl.
- In previous years, a winner has never been in the bottom 2 before. Which means, according to maths (which is my sole guide now), the winner is either Joe or Stacey. Please god let it be Stacey. Please. If Joe wins it will mean we’ve learnt nothing since 2001. Nothing! It would invalidate everything that the important victory of Will Young over Gareth Gates symbolised. Don’t let it happen people!!
- I now have a mint tea and am calm.
-I love Dannii. She’s getting rebellious against the Cowell. I think he might fire her, but still. I love her attitude.
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